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November 7, 2012
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what; original story, interlude [A hundred lives].
character; unnamed character {Hanel} & secondary character {Nakir}.
summary; being human is just too hard, she thinks.
warnings; change of POV.


--- x x x X X X x x x ---

When had she harbored that thought?

For that whole day, Nakir had sat in an open field, allowing her body to hold just the barest hint of reality as to allow rays of sunlight to touch her. She had not moved, had not breathed. Instead, her eyes continued facing forward, lost in whatever pattern of thought which would assault her mind. It had been a need for that closure, a need that had been almost physical and she did not understand.

She was not supposed to try. And she still did, was not it a sign that something was deeply wrong with her?

Nakir had had thoughts in the past years. Thoughts about freedom, about safety, about fairness and judgment. It was truly ridiculous. Where had they come from? For whatever purpose? Her kind had never been supposed to hold something as meaningless as questions. Such was reserved for luckier beings, the ones loved by the Father, the ones guided and yet left to themselves. The ones who held answers and the ability to search when they did not.

She was not human. She was not. Nakir had always known her purpose in life, her calling and destiny. Things like her were made solely for that single task and yet, why did she fail so horribly?

If she were human, she would have screamed in anger. She was not, she did not hold the ability to voice feelings or even to feel them.

It was a cycle, like everything else was. And Nakir knew herself to be strapped tight into it, being foolish enough to try searching for an answer for which there was no correct question. Was this something humans faced daily? If so, her respect went to each and every soul, even to her wayward fool who was probably still searching for her.

Which brought her right back to the reason for her stress, for each worry.

When Hanel had been convicted, Nakir had waited no moment to think about the reason. She was no judge. She was the one who came when the doors were closed and the veredict was said, ready to take that soul to the world bellow them, to teach all the lessons it had disregarded in that first life. But the problem was… when had she started to think it was unfair? When had she started to think it was too much? It was wrong? It was a torture, slow and painful and…

"Nakir!"

For the first time in those twenty four hours, the Executioner turned, allowed the world outside to bash into her consciousness due to a man's voice. A young boy's, he was just a boy again and again.

The small human ran to her side, dark hair spilling over his eyes, hiding them carefully as he fought to regain the breath lost in his mad run. And he stopped, when it became slow and even, his eyes searched for hers and was that admonishment she saw?

"I was searching for you! I didn't see you since yesterday and you never do that! What's wrong with you anyway, letting me worry all the time?!"

Worry? Why would this little thing, this fragile creature worry over his own murderer? It made little to no sense to her, just as her questions earlier had not. But he still talked, scolded her loudly like he had every right to do so. He didn't, he was no one to her. No, that wasn't right, it was supposed to be the other way around. She was the invisible one, she was no one to him, dearest Father, she had never been so confused in her long existence.

And then small arms were around her neck hugging tightly, a hand was on her hair, going up and down, up and down, up and down, again and again while there was that something pushing something else against the wall of her ribs. She wanted… Nakir wasn't sure what she wanted because she should had never nodded those three times, those three which had made her a prisoner just as he was.

"Don't cry, Nakir." It was his voice somewhere above her, his form towering over her knelt one. "You don't need to cry. It's okay. Everything will be okay."

That.. humans called that comfort, didn't they? But she didn't cry, he had no reason to try and do…

"Tomorrow, we'll wake up and things will make sense, right? Twenty years and then we'll change and still be the same. That makes sense. That's constant, that's something that never changes. So don't cry. I'm here."

She wasn't crying. Her kind could not cry. She was… just confused, a little lost with no guide to take her hand. That was all.

Slowly, one of her hands moved to grasp wool beneath her fingers, held until she could feel each fragment of the tissue biting into her skin. For the first time, the very first time since she knew herself, she was reaching out. He had offered. He had offered and she was holding onto it because humans did that.

She was not a human.

"Tomorrow, we will be okay," he whispered again. "It's alright."

But she still believed.
Interlude 2 - Nakir's perspective.

I'll eventually finish this, yes.
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:iconenaidaderyn:
EnaidAderyn Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2012
Oh, Rey. I do hope you feel inspired to finish this. It's so original and intriguing, and a perfect vehicle for your lovely haunting style. I'm not exaggerating when I say this put me in mind of Neil Gaiman's work - that same lyrical, haunting beauty of concept and prose. I can't begin to praise it enough.
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:icondayofautumn:
dayofautumn Featured By Owner Dec 6, 2012
Okay so. I read this and stared and stared some more. First, I never thought it'd look interesting to someone outside my head. But then you compared it to one of my favorite authors and I melted into a puddle of goo. Thank you so much :tighthug: ;.;
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:iconliddlereeee:
LiDdleReEee Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
O.O

You better finish this. I really enjoyed it. I like how with limited text I was still able to connect with the characters and get a feel for their emotions. This is great
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:icondayofautumn:
dayofautumn Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012
Seriously? I had this whole thing in my head but I ended up losing interest and turning it into a very short story. I'll see if I can finish up some time. I do know how to do it. Glad you liked it though :D
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:iconliddlereeee:
LiDdleReEee Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I do. It didn't take me long to get attached. It is also a really interesting concept over all. I quite enjoy it. This is the kind of stuff you read in school and have to analyze.. except.. its actually interesting o_o
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:icondayofautumn:
dayofautumn Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2012
So slightly deep but not so much that it'd scare the crap out of you. I'll take it! Seriously, in my head it sounded like a much more interesting story. I just never got around to write it.
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:iconliddlereeee:
LiDdleReEee Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Well I hope you finish it. I really enjoy it :)
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:icondayofautumn:
dayofautumn Featured By Owner Nov 21, 2012
When I have a bit of time, I'll try.
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